She's Here...

Baby A is here. She was born last Friday via c-section. She is a sweet baby. I still cannot get over how big she was. She weighed 8 pounds, 7 ounces. Here are a few pictures of her in her first few days of life. Big A and Little A are getting used to having a little sister. Big A loves to play mommy junior. She is so proud that she has a sister. Nursing is going fairly well. It has been so hot here in the Pacific Northwest that just to make sure that Baby A is getting enough I have supplemented a little with a few ounces of formula here and there when she is still hungry and I don't have anymore of my own milk. I am careful to only do this as a last resort because I for sure don't want it to interfere with my milk production. I sure hope she is getting enough though.

Baby A is a sweet baby. Although, in the hospital she quickly got a reputation with her screaming and crying. Baby A loves to be held and since she is my last baby I am probably indulging her a little too much.

I am doing okay. I am still very swollen from all of the fluids from the surgery. I was really hoping it would be gone by now, especially in my feet. The swelling is uncomfortable and rather painful too. If you have any suggestions for reducing swelling please post a comment.

Oh you can see my hospital gown in one of the pictures. It worked out really well.
1 week old

Hospital crib

Big brother and Big sister checking her out

Big A holding Baby A

3 days old

Mama who is a little out of it

I am still here...still pregnant...

Yes, I am still pregnant. I am sorry for not updating my blog in almost a month. I was so good for a while. I have been struggling with the last weeks of pregnancy and it is difficult to think of something blog worthy to write.
Here are some of the things that I have been working on or thinking about:(sorry the pictures are not the greatest...it was the lighting.)

Nursing/Handmade Nursing Cover Up
I made a nursing cover up out some fabulous new fabric and was actually able to make a few burp clothes to go with it. I am a little nervous about this because with my other two pregnancies I was not able to make enough milk to sustain my kids, I have always had to supplement. I am hoping and praying this time I will make enough milk and even have a tea to try that my friend swears by. We will see. I want to be realistically optimistic. I was devastated the with Big A when I couldn’t solely nurse and spend seven months with a crazy rigorous feeding schedule of nursing, feeding bottle of pumped milk from previous pumping session, feeding a few ounces of formula (yes three bottles) and then pumping again after the feeding. It was too much to do with my second so I would just nurse and supplement little a with formula. I know breast milk is best, but when you have tried everything to make it work and it is not, thank God there is such thing as formula. I would prefer for my body to work as it is supposed to, but it has failed me so many times…I must be realistic. The positives: at least there is formula, the baby can thrive off of it and it is readily available. The negatives: formula is not as good as breast milk for the baby, formula doesn’t help shed the unwanted pregnancy pounds, the cost of formula is very high compared to free breast milk, it is not as convenient when you have to wash bottles, prep formula, make sure you have it with you everywhere, formula stains, formula smells, formula diapers stink more and have to be rinsed before washing (if you are using cloth). Anyways, there is the list. I am hopeful, but at the same time know that I have struggled with this in the past…I am not sure what would change with the third pregnancy, but maybe…do you think?


Two Weeks and Counting Down
Although, I have been trying to stay distracted and busy so I don’t think about how much I want this little girl out of me, I am still counting down. There are things that I want to finish before she gets here, but I would be so happy if she came right now. My c-section is scheduled for two weeks from today. I hope I don’t make it that long, but I am not the one in charge.
I decided to sew my own maternity gown, but I am a little stuck on it now. I have not followed a pattern in two decades so it is a little difficult to know what to do with things like interfacing and what not. It is all cut out, but I don’t have the interfacing and I am not sure if it’s a must or not. We will see. I’ll post pictures when I am done, that is assuming I finish it.

Balance
I have been trying to balance things in my life. I don’t have a lot of balance right now. I struggle with it and that is one reason I am excited to be going back to work sixty percent, it helps create some sort of balance and order in my crazy life. Right now balance is particularly difficult to achieve because of the crazy hormones, waiting for this baby to decide if she is coming early or not, it is summer and things are a little out of routine due to that, both the hubby and I are home (we both teach) for the summer (this is good in many ways and also creates some problems in other ways), my three year old is still toilet training resistant (honestly, I am tempted to just put her back in disposable diapers and forget it…I have never met a more stubborn child in my life or a more difficult task and I am a teacher), my son will be two in a few weeks (need I remind you about the terrible twos), and my life and body are out of my control. I don’t know if you can achieve balance without some measure of control. It is an interesting thought to ponder.

Well I have a few ideas for posts in the next few days. I hope everyone enjoys a wonderful weekend.

Jen D.

Baby Update and Hospital Delivery Gown

(This was supposed to be posted yesterday, but I have been having a few technical issues, all hardware/software related with NetGear.

I went to the doctor yesterday and everything is fine with the little girl growing inside. I have a little less than six weeks to go. I am hoping shorter, but we will see. If she comes a little early I will be very excited. Although, my c-section is already scheduled and I am thankful that the date is the closest to my due date that they will allow one to be performed. These last six weeks are usually the most difficult for me to do lack of sleep, being uncomfortable, feeling awkward and just gross. This pregnancy seems to be even harder. I am not sure if that is because it was a surprise or I have two toddlers this time or if my body is just tired of being pregnant or a little of all three.
I have continued my nesting streak and have been working on my To Do List before the little one is born. As I have mentioned before I love to cross things off my To Do List. It is so satisfying.



One thing I am considering is a bringing my own hospital gown with me to the hospital. I can’t stand the scratchy, icky gowns that they give you in the hospital to wear. They also seem to be the most unflattering thing to wear to have your picture taken with the new baby. Case in point, see the picture below of me with little a.



I have found several gowns that I could purchase, but the frugal side of me is apprehensive to spend so much money on a gown like that. I would love to try to make one or have my MIL make me one. I think that would be the most frugal thing to do, but lately when I have brought up any sort of sewing project she hasn’t objected, but she hasn’t really volunteered or made time to do them. I can’t imagine spending $35 up to a $100 on one gown, but at the same time I really want one. I would love something like either one of my top choices listed below, which I could wear later to nurse in at night. I could really use something to feel a little more attractive in when I am at the hospital, not to mention a little more modest since the hospital gowns open up in back. I would love something to hide my horrible arms (my legs and arms seems to swell up when I am pregnant…no I am not kidding…although they could probably use A LOT of toning once I am done with this pregnancy.) I would try to make my own gown, but I am not that great at sewing and I would be afraid to waste my money on the fabric and have it not work. I also don’t have a serger, which seems like it would be necessary for durability.



So here is my dilemma do I just do it, purchase one? Do I ask my MIL to make me one? Do I try to make my own? Do I buy some nursing pajamas instead (could I wear these for the first picture w/my c-section)? Or do I just not bother with bring my own gown? I don’t know.

Here are my top two choices, although I have been considering this third one mainly due to the price.

Doctor's Appointment

I am thinking I will post two posts tomorrow to make up for this not so great post that I am posting now. I am trying to get a post done everyday, but it is not easy.

I had my doctor's appointment today. Things seem to be going well with the little girl inside me. She is measuring perfect and I got my glucose test back and it was negative. I am however slightly anemic, but I would rather be a little low on iron than be diabetic. I am so glad that I don't have to go through the ordeal of having the three hour test. Unfortunately, being anemic means I will need to start taking an iron supplement (hence the picture of pills). Not fun, but better than a special diet for GD. On a not so great note, the new practice that my doctor is with will not even give me the option of a VBAC. To add insult to injury they won't even consider scheduling my mandated c-section anytime before 39 weeks without an amnio and I have no input into the date. My doctor just submits a request to scheduling and that is it no input from either of us. This is a real bummer since I have the same due date with this new little baby that I had with little a. Plus I was really hoping to have her birthday be at least a week earlier than his. Now it looks like unless she decides she will be born on a different day that I may even end up going the full 40 weeks. I think I may resort to inducing my own labor if that is to happen. I am so done with being pregnant now as it is. I can't even wrap my mind around having to go full term. Ugh! I just keep saying this too shall pass, but now it will be a little longer than I had hoped it would be. I have never been accused of being lucky and I definitely know why. Plus with little a I spent the majority of my summer just waiting for him to arrive. I was really hoping to not repeat that this summer. Plus being pregnant in the summer is miserable (plus I am already a terrible pregnant), especially without AC. There is nothing I can do at this point. I am learning that I have very little control over anything in this life. Well hopefully your Tuesday was not as disappointing as mine.

Hodge Podge Post

Well today was a much better day than either this Saturday or Sunday. I can’t believe I am posting this, but I seem to be transparent on this blog and so why start being something different now.


I pretty much lost it on Saturday. Big A went poop in her pants again and I just couldn’t deal. I felt the world closing in on me. I had a huge breakdown. Obviously, if I am okay blogging about it now I survived and I am okay. The picture is of me crying in my car, parked in my garage. I was going to go somewhere, but I couldn’t think of anywhere to go and I knew that in my emotional state I shouldn’t be driving, so I just stayed in my car. I called my mom and cried for a while on her shoulder. I got some potty training advice from her and then both my aunt and uncle. I wish that I could say that helped, but it didn’t. I was pretty shook up. The poopy pants incident was just the straw that broke the camels back so to speak. I have been feeling pretty horrible lately. As I have mentioned before pregnancy just doesn’t agree with me. Well in the car I tried to pull it together so I could go upstairs and face the rest of the night and my so called life. I had posted on Facebook that “I wished there was a place where you could exchange lives.” This was before I got in my car. In the car I was trying to delete that status from my phone, but was unable to. I am still learning how to use my phone. Anyways, playing with my phone was a good distraction and I took this self-portrait in the mirror of my car with the phone. I am a mess. You can see my make up is all smeared and I have black circles around my eyes. I prayed, listened to some praise and worship music and tried to pull myself together. I am hoping that I will feel better about my life and myself one day soon, but until then I guess I will just have to fake it until I make it.

Sunday was just like any other day around our home. I cooked, cleaned, took care of the kids, went to church. You never would have known it was Mother’s Day if you were just peaking in the window. I was bummed about it at first, but I am sure there are a lot of us out there that had similar experiences. I love my kids and I am glad to be their mom, even if it is a very disrespected, never ending, all consuming job. My poor hubby was having a bad day with his own stuff so he was unable to physically do anything to help out. I am starting to accept that life is just hard sometimes.


So today was a much better day. I don’t teach on Mondays so I took Big A and little a to a coffee shop with a friend and her kids. It is a coffee shop that has play area with a paid babysitter that watches your kids. It was my first time going there. It was a lot of fun and my friend and I got to chat and hang out. My kids didn’t stay in the area the whole time, but it was fine. Big A didn’t have any potty accidents so we went to a fancy grocery store afterward our play date and she got to push a cart all of her own. She was so happy. It was very cute. She did pretty well on peeing in the toilet today, but those BM’s are something else. I pray that she just gets it soon.

Before meeting my friend I went and met a lady selling some diapers on Craigslist. I ended up getting some new fluff for the little girl due this summer. I am so excited about these. They are stuffable AIO diapers made by Blueberry and Swaddlebees. I have two Blueberry diapers that I just love already and Blueberry/Swaddlebees is the same company. I can’t wait to try them out. A few of them should fit Big A right now so I might try them on her stuffed for overnight on Thursday. I am washing diapers now. I won’t cloth diaper again this week until Thursday night. I don’t tend use them when I am working. It is just too much for me. I am looking forward to the summer when I can cloth diaper almost a hundred percent. Adding great diapers to my stash always makes me smile and getting a good deal on them is even better.

Well I am doing pretty good on my postings. Now I just have to plan for the rest of the week when I am busy working. Tomorrow, I have a doctor’s appointment and get to see how the little mover and shaker inside me is doing. I will try to post an update either tomorrow or on Wednesday. Have a great week.

Jen D.

MOPS Carnival and Painted Belly...

This morning was our second to last MOPS meeting for the year. The year has flown by so fast. I am thankful to have found MOPS. It has been wonderful to be a part such a great team this year that works so hard to put MOPS on for the local moms. We had a carnival for our second to last meeting. It was fabulous. We had games, prizes, carnival food, face painting, group photo session, and a picture frame craft. We also had a few group games to start out. It was a blast if I do say so myself. We had a great turn out and I think all the ladies really enjoyed themselves. I am excited to continue to be on the steering team next year.

So while everyone was cleaning up (usually I help as well) the face painting gal was kind enough to stay and paint a design on my HUGE belly (see the design above). This is something totally out of character for me have done. I mean I am very modest and usually don’t just show my belly to anyone, anywhere. There is another gal there who is a totally cute pregnant gal, unlike me and hers looked so cute so I thought I would give it a try. I guess I am glad I did because I would never know unless I tried. After this experience, I have decided that nothing really makes me cute when I am pregnant. I am just huge (and still have a few months left) and not cute and that is just how pregnancy is for me. I am learning to accept it. I mean this is my third pregnancy in less than four years. I have had a lot of practice with it and should just know by now that I am not cute and have not felt good about me since I got pregnant the first time. I am hoping one day I will feel better about myself and that I will feel more like me eventually. I am still working out (not that you could tell) and I try to eat relatively healthy. I don’t use being pregnant as an excuse to eat more, but it doesn’t seem to matter, I am still huge. Oh well!

I remember when I was first pregnant with Big A. I had all of these grand plans of how great pregnancy would be and that I would just stay the same, but add a belly. Boy was I wrong. Pregnancy and I just don’t mix. I gained weight everywhere with my first and then I got pregnant seven months later with my second and couldn’t seem to lose the weight from the first before getting pregnant. I gained less with my second and I have gained less with my third (I haven't gained anything in two months, but I am still gigantic. No, I am not a cute, glowing pregnant lady, more like a huge, unattractive, blob. I have lost hope now that I will ever be the same again. Oh well, such is life. I was definitely not blessed with good genetics that is for sure. I often wonder how and why God made me this way. One day maybe I will feel better, but for now I am just pregnant and positively miserable. The good news is the pregnancy will come and go and out of the whole ordeal I get a baby to love and raise for the next however many years. The good and bad news is I will never be me again now that I have had children. I am still trying to wrap my mind around that one. Some days are okay and I can accept that. There are other days where I just want to run back in time and be me again.

An update on the potty training journey…Big A didn’t have any accidents at MOPS, but she did have two accidents within an hour of each other at a MOPS lunch that we had after tear down and clean up. I was bummed that I had to leave, but I didn’t have any clothes for her and I told her if she had another accident we would be going home. She started to throw a fit, but ended up making it out of there without kicking and screaming. I don’t know what I am going to do with that girl. I am thinking of having the two older neighbor girls make fun of her for wetting her pants. Is that just mean of me or what? It sure doesn’t matter when I tell her that “Babies pee and poop in their pants. Big girls pee and poop in the toilet.” She doesn’t seem to care about anything. Nothing motivates her, but the little girl at the babysitters. What am I going to do?

Well I hope everyone enjoys a great weekend. I am still going to try to keep positing once a day for the next eight days. 